What Not To Do If You Are Selling Kirby Vacuum Cleaners Door To Door Tell me it’s going to take a half an hour, then be at my house for 2 hours instead. Tell me about the time you spent a night in jail because of a traffic violation. Proceed to tell me about the day in court where you defended yourself for said traffic violation and how the judge was a jerk. Tell me how one of the people whose house you went to asked you not to kill her when you went into her house for a demonstration; and then tell me that you are too lazy and not ambitious enough for that kind of thing, because you know, murder and robbery takes too much energy and planning. Ask to use the bathroom and be in there for a really long time. Tell me all about your new diet and everything you eat and drink in a day. Talk to your boss about me on the phone while in my house right in front of me and list all the reasons why I said no to buying a $2,000 vacuum cleaner while I sit there feeling awkward.

Precede a sentence with, “I’m not racist,” then continue with mostly racist statements. Tell me all about the contest that you want to win, which is a trip to Lake George, and that is why I need to buy a vacuum cleaner today, because for some reason it’s my job to help you with said contest. Hand me a flyer about said contest with your sale goals and sales tips on it. Side note: this is for YOUR training purposes, not for customer’s viewing pleasure. Ask me where my kids go to school. All of these things happened the other day when some guy came to my door selling vacuums cleaners. My first reaction was no, but he promised he’d be in and out in a half an hour, so I caved. Since we are having a ton of people over for Easter, I figured I’d get a free shampoo out of the deal. The shampoo job wasn’t even that great. This entry was posted in In The Home and tagged awkward, door to door salesmen, home, kirby, vaccums. Upon returning from dinner, Ken found the empty Coke can on his porch.

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